What life has taught me

Many years ago, I saw a silent Polish film no longer than ten minutes, its story kept returning to my mind from time to time, especially whenever I saw someone from my family or acquaintances face something in their life they cannot handle or control. The simple story begins with a scene of a vast sea, from which two men emerge, both dressed fully, carrying together, each on one end, an old, large wardrobe consisting of three doors, with a big mirror on the middle door. The two men walk toward the beach, struggling greatly with this wardrobe, until they reach the land in a state of extreme exhaustion, then begin to wander around the city while still carrying the wardrobe. If they want to ride the tram, they try to climb the stairs with the wardrobe amid the crowd and protests. If they become hungry and want to enter a restaurant, they try to enter with the wardrobe, but the owner expels them. The film only depicts their desperate attempts to continue life while carrying their heavy wardrobe, until they end up returning from where they came, reaching the beach we saw at the beginning of the film, then gradually disappearing into the sea, submerged by the water while still carrying the wardrobe. Since I saw this film, I have imagined my situation and the situation of everyone I know as if each of us is carrying a heavy wardrobe, bringing it into life and spending our days carrying it without any chance to get rid of it, then dying while still holding it. However, this wardrobe is invisible, and we may spend our lives pretending it does not exist, or what we think are our choices. I did not choose my father and mother, nor the type of family I was born into, nor the number of my siblings and my position among them, nor did I choose my height or shortness, nor my level of handsomeness or ugliness, or the strengths and weaknesses in my body and mind. All of this I have to carry wherever I go, and I have no hope of getting rid of it.